These issues not only affect you, but you are likely to show your lack of attention in your body language. We may also get distracted by the speaker’s personal appearance or by what someone else is saying, which sounds more interesting. It is more difficult, for example, to focus on somebody who is speaking very fast and very quietly, especially if they are conveying complex information. Generally we find it easier to focus if the speaker is fluent in their speech, has a familiar accent, and speaks at an appropriate loudness for the situation. Of course the clarity of what the speaker is saying can also affect how well we listen. It is a common habit for the listener to use the spare time while listening to daydream or think about other things, rather than focusing on what the speaker is saying. Average speech rates are between 125 and 175 words a minute whereas we can process on average between 400 and 800 words a minute. This problem is attributed, in part, to the difference between average speech rate and average processing rate. This means that we do not fully listen to the rest of the speaker’s message. To improve the process of effective listening, it can be helpful to turn the problem on its head and look at barriers to effective listening, or ineffective listening.įor example, one common problem is that instead of listening closely to what someone is saying, we often get distracted after a sentence or two and instead start to think about what we are going to say in reply or think about unrelated things. Our eBooks are ideal for anyone who wants to learn about or develop their interpersonal skills and are full of easy-to-follow, practical information. Learn more about the key communication skills you need to be a more effective communicator. We should try to focus fully on what is being said and how it's being said in order to more fully understand the speaker. Often our main concern while listening is to formulate ways to respond. To arrive at a shared and agreed understanding and acceptance of both sides views. To develop an selflessness approach, putting the speaker first. To encourage the speaker to communicate fully, openly and honestly. To show interest, concern and concentration. To observe the non-verbal signals accompanying what is being said to enhance understanding. (See our page on Critical Thinking for more). To gain a full and accurate understanding into the speakers point of view and ideas. To specifically focus on the messages being communicated, avoiding distractions and preconceptions. Listening serves a number of possible purposes, and the purpose of listening will depend on the situation and the nature of the communication. There is no doubt that effective listening is an extremely important life skill. Interplay: the process of interpersonal communicating (8th edn), Fort Worth, TX: Harcourt. See our pages: Active Listening and Types of Listening for more information.īased on the research of: Adler, R., Rosenfeld, L. The phrase ‘ active listening’ is used to describe this process of being fully involved. In fact, the listener can, and should, be at least as engaged in the process as the speaker. Listening means paying attention not only to the story, but how it is told, the use of language and voice, and how the other person uses his or her body. In other words, it means being aware of both verbal and non-verbal messages. Your ability to listen effectively depends on the degree to which you perceive and understand these messages. Listening, however, requires more than that: it requires focus and concentrated effort, both mental and sometimes physical as well. It is a physical process that, provided you do not have any hearing problems, happens automatically. Hearing refers to the sounds that enter your ears. Studies have shown that, whereas speaking raises blood pressure, attentive listening can bring it down. Good listening skills also have benefits in our personal lives, including:Ī greater number of friends and social networks, improved self-esteem and confidence, higher grades at school and in academic work, and even better health and general well-being. See our pages: Employability Skills and Customer Service Skills for more examples of the importance of listening in the workplace. Spend some time thinking about and developing your listening skills – they are the building blocks of success. Personal and Romantic Relationship SkillsĮffective listening is a skill that underpins all positive human relationships.Conflict Resolution and Mediation Skills.Conversation Tips for Getting What You Want.Non-Verbal Communication: Face and Voice.Tips for Effective Interpersonal Communication.The SkillsYouNeed Guide to Interpersonal Skills
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